By WBØRUR, on the scene
NACODOCHES, West Virginia — Mr. Harold “Butch” Crutchfield of Upper Combover County is nursing a gunshot wound to the upper thigh, after presenting his wife with an outstanding Valentine’s Day present: an Alpha 9500 amplifier!
“She’d been hinting around that she wanted something really special this year,” says the 63-year-old civil engineer. “So I thought about it for a while… and chose the amp. It’s a great piece of equipment!”
Crutchfield, a ham radio operator since 1988, ordered the amplifier online. It was delivered just days before the traditional “love-bird” holiday.
“I didn’t even have a chance to gift wrap it before she ripped into the packaging. We’ve been married for 32 years,” says Crutchfield. “And I’ve got to be honest. I’m about out of creative gift-giving ideas.”
According to a spokesman for the local ham radio club, Marti Jane Crutchfield (the ham’s wife) was so excited upon un-boxing the amp that she retrieved her husband’s shotgun to fire celebratory gunshots into the air.
Apparently one of the blasts caught Butch in the upper thigh.
“I’ll be alright eventually,” he says philosophically. “But I won’t be climbing my tower anytime soon, that’s for sure.”
A year ago, Mr. Crutchfield presented his wife with an RG -58 coax bouquet, complete with silver and gold Teflon connectors, which he says “shimmered like my wife’s eyes.”
Local hams may recall the freak accident last year, when the coax bouquet twisted around Crutchfield’s left forearm and broke his fall from the 2nd story balcony.