Trump Promises Greatest Propagation Ever

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NEWINGSTEAD, VT –  Newly inaugurated President Trump wasted no time reaching out to members of the amateur radio community. On Monday, President Trump was the keynote speaker at a banquet co-sponsored by radio equipment manufacturer Peanut Whistle Transmitters Inc. and the National Radio Retransmission Legion (NRRL). Trump was a surprise late addition to the speaker lineup for the annual two-day “Radio in America” gathering at the NRRL’s headquarters.

“We invited him as a courtesy, but honestly didn’t expect he’d show up. I assume he’s a very busy man,” said NRRL president Bob Gilligan. “But then I received a call yesterday from the Trump administration who informed us that the President would most certainly meet with such great communicators. We were shocked! To fit in the President we had to cancel Wiley Roger’s planned panel discussion on his hypothesis that blue-colored wire has increased his DX performance.”

President Trump’s speech to the 27 attendees lasted a little over three hours and ranged in topics from installing antennas atop Trump Tower to the low sunspot cycle. When Peanut Whistle Transmitter Company’s Chief Counsel asked Trump if he had any plans to improve propagation as we approach a new low in the sunspot cycle, President Trump had no reservations in stating, “My administration will bring amazing propagation to all of you. To all American hams. It’ll be the best. The best propagation. So big. They’ll be so much DX, we’ll be exporting it to other counties. You’ve never seen propagation like the propagation we’ll have.”

Trump closed the banquet with the announcement that he’ll immediately sign an executive order to increase sunspot counts to 1000 within the next 100 days. Ham Hijinks inquired with NOAA Space Weather Scientist Ramish Pental about how the administration would go about this executive order. He quickly replied, “It literally makes zero sense. I have no idea whatsoever.”​

By K5PO, on the scene


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