Club Votes: Bob Should Buy New Radio

By WBØRUR, on the scene

LOOKOUT PEAK, MINNESOTA — A local amateur radio group has decided “enough is enough” and is taking steps to correct a “real problem.”

During their monthly meeting last Sunday night at Golden Corral, members of the Twin Peaks Amateur Radio Club (TPARC) voted unanimously to send a strongly worded message to long-time ham radio operator Bob Schemp: “You should buy a new radio.”  

“This is all news to me,” says the ham. But then again, the radio doesn’t receive very well, either.”

“In July, Bob watched a Discovery Channel show about surviving an EMF blast. Since then, he’s sold all his radio gear and only uses a VHF hand-held,” says Buff Orpington, president of TPARC. “But his signal is so weak you only hear every 5th syllable on the local repeater.”

Orpington says Bob takes the radio in the car, on daily walks with the dog, and on weekend fishing trips to the lake.

“In the past, we had such great QSOs. Now it’s as if I’m talking to myself! Members tell Bob on the repeater that he’s ‘not hitting the machine’ or he is ‘picket-fencing’…but there’s been no improvement. None at all. It’s a real issue,” said Orpington.

Members say while planning the club’s annual picnic on the weekly VHF net, the group heard Bob agree to bring a charcoal grill. But in fact, Bob was only asking for directions to a nearby military surplus store to purchase additional MREs and kerosene.

Notified of the club’s vote by telephone, Schemp told Ham Hijinks he is unaware of members telling him about a signal issue.

“This is all news to me,” says the ham. “But then again, the radio doesn’t receive very well, either.”

Bob adds that he’ll invest in a new mobile radio as soon as he finishes the Faraday cage in his master bedroom.

### HamHijinks.com

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